Phyllis Chen Zixuan
Blk 35 Bedok North Street 4
#08-374
S(460035)
(+65) 9151 8982 (m)
phyllischenzx@gmail.com
February 18, 2013
Dr. Esther Clews
Tropical Marine Science Institute
National University of Singapore
S2S 18 Kent Ridge Road
Singapore 119227
Dear Dr. Clews:
Application for research
assistant inland waters EMID
As a graduate from
National University of Singapore (NUS) in life sciences, I would like to apply
for the research assistant position in Ecological Monitoring, Dynamics and
Informatics (EMID) group which was advertised on Tropical Marine Science
Institute of Singapore (TMSI) official website.In line with the goal
of EMID, I have always been passionate about sustaining the aquatic
environment. Hence, Dr. Sandric Leong, my internship supervisor from the marine
biology lab of TMSI recommended this job position. Moreover, having the relevant
aquatic research skills and being a versatile team player make me a suitable
candidate for this job vacancy.
Through the two years
of internship, I have gained vast knowledge on scientific equipment and acquired analytical skills for research purposes. In scientific laboratory, I am
responsible for microalgae culture maintenance and sample nutrient analysis by
using analytical equipment During field trip expeditions, I am accountable for
water sample preservation for nutrients analysis, as well as, on-site data
handling to determine the target destination for water quality parameter
sampling. For both scenarios, the ecological data obtained was processed,
analysed and interpreted using specific software. Hence, my internship opportunity
honed my proficiency in equipment handling and on data analysis which will facilitate
an efficient research process.
I have always believed
that teamwork is essential for both work and social setting. As an intern in
marine biology lab, I have successfully collaborated with different laboratory
personnel to accomplish research projects on harmful algal bloom. From these
projects, I have gained important teamwork skills which are mandatory to yield
desired results. As an orientation house leader, I have effectively worked with
4 group leaders and led a house of 150 freshmen through their orientation camp.
With excellent teamwork between the leaders and the freshmen, my house was
awarded the ‘best house’ for science orientation week 2011. In essence, the
teamwork skill I have attained prepares me for research team.
I believe that the
relevant aquatic research skills and knowledge will help EMID research group to
sustain the aquatic ecology in Singapore, and I look forward to meeting with
you to further explain how I can contribute to EMID research group. If you have
any questions, please contact me at 91518982, or by e-mail at phyllischenzx@gmail.com. Thank you
for your time and consideration.
Sincerely,
Phyllis Chen Zixuan
* thankyou in advance for your valuable feedbacks and critiques.
*Revised on 27/2/2013. [Thank you Sharlene, Sofie, Mikaela and Xiaowei for your critiques.]
*Revised on 27/2/2013. [Thank you Sharlene, Sofie, Mikaela and Xiaowei for your critiques.]
Hi Phyllis,
ReplyDeleteI am impressed by your cover letter. It sounded invincible to me and I felt that you were deserving of that position. (However, I’ve got to admit that all the scientific terms felt very foreign to me when I was reading your cover letter.)
For the third paragraph in particular, I felt that you were very clear in explaining the importance of analytical skills for the job post. It convinced me that the two years internship programme you had trained you to collect, process and analyse samples efficiently. I thought that whatever you mentioned in that paragraph was highly relevant to the requirements of the job post you are applying for. In my opinion, you can perhaps include some leadership skills you possess on top of the internship programme. This will portray you to be an even more deserving candidate for that position.
All in all, I felt that your cover letter was well structured and clear. Good job. Please do feel free to comment on my cover letter!
Sharlene.
Thankyou for valuable feedback, which reminded me that the HR personnel reading my cover letter may not understand the scientific equipment and terms I have used. I have also commented on your cover letter, hope that my suggestions help.Relax and enjoy your recess week. See you around in school.
DeletePhyllis,
ReplyDeleteThis is a very very good cover letter.
I like both the content and the way you write. Your writing is feeling professional but at the same time easy to read and understand.
It is good that you included your teamplayer skills, and not only th aquatic research skills.
The only tips I can give you (cause other that this it was close to perfection)is to try to give a personal touch in the cover letter. You need to capture the attention of the employer, so you are the one that will get an interview.
Very good Phyllis!
Sofie
Thankyou for your time and valuable feedback, I will amend it as soon as possible. Enjoy your recess week! See you around in school.
DeleteHi Phyllis,
ReplyDeleteI liked reading your cover letter! Especially the second and last paragraph I think are really convincing, and showing that you are suitable for the position. Thou I think that you should divide the first sentences in the first paragraph into two, it is a little bit too long. Furthermore I think there are too much scientific terms in your letter, especially in the third paragraph. Maybe you can move some of the info there to your CV.
See you in class :)
Mikaela
Thankyou for your valuable feedback, which reminded me that the HR personnel reading my cover letter may not understand the scientific equipment and terms I have used. I have made amendments accordingly. See you in class:)
DeleteHi Phyllis!
ReplyDeleteI really like your cover letter as your content illustrated you as a really hardworking candidate. I have a few suggestions that may hopefully be useful to you.
I feel that the 2nd and 3rd paragraph could be switched over as your work experience may be more relevant to the employer. I do agree with the rest that you should summarise your 3rd paragraph. You may consider not listing the equipment that you have used. Also, note the small error in that starting sentence “I have gained vast knowledge on scientific equipment…”. In addition, I think you may not want to use “processed”, “analysed” and “interpreted” all in one sentence. You can include how you have contributed to the research or how you have developed your management skills in the lab.
In my own opinion, this sentence in the 2nd paragraph: “I have successful(ly) collaborated with lab personnel from different laborator(ies) to accomplish laborious research projects on harmful algal blooms with fruitful results.” is a bit vague. You may choose to break this sentence up and elaborate further on how this hones your teamwork skills. Lastly, you can wrap up this paragraph with how your experiences make you a well suited candidate for the position.
For your conclusion, I think you may want to rephrase “I believe that teamwork, relevant aquatic research skills and knowledge will help EMID research group” to “I believe that my relevant aquatic research skills and knowledge will help…” or something along that line.
Just some additional feedback that I got regarding my own cover letter that I can share with you, that is the alternating use of “lab” and “laboratory”. It may be best to use the original form rather than short form I guess. :)
All in all, you have some excellent work experiences. Great job!
Xiao Wei.